Dad

One of Kai's Valentine's Day gifts arrived early.

Now, anyone who knows me knows that I normally distribute my gifts early. I get too excited in the hub-bub and build up to whatever the big day is that we're all awaiting. I've always been like that and most likely will not change at this point.

Niko's first Christmas is going to be interesting. It may be the first time a child tells a parent, "It's 4am, please go back to bed mommy".

So, I found this amazing collection of Amharic tees, coffee mugs, aprons, etc. When I saw the "DAD" tee, I sqealed and whipped out my credit card. Sold. (I know Kai doesn't look very excited in the picture, but he really is).

We girls blog, shop, read and talk about being a mom from day one. We've referred to each other with the ultimate title of "mom" or "mommy" at some point already. Our mothers, sisters and friends have had heart to hearts about what motherhold holds. I wouldn't imagine the average dad-in-waiting encounters the amount of warm & fuzzy "oh boy, we can call you daddy soon" moments as us.

I kind of saw this when Kai opened his present and asked "What does this say?" When I simply said "Dad", I saw the coolest look on Kai's face.

Ups & Eccchs

I'm making a conscious effort right now to be a more timely-blogger. Through the rest of our journey, I will make every attempt to not let it slip in excess of a week, like now. It takes a lot of mind-energy to get back in the flow. I feel like I need to list a diary of events in order to catch up for the past week and that's no fun for anyone, especially the reader!

So, to recap I'll simply highlight the ups & not-so-ups; some adoption-related and some not.

Ech: The waitlist crew have all set their sights on a 7.2 month average wait time. That was the trend with our agency at the time of our last conference call prior to the holidays. Well, the new conference call happened this week and we're all back up to an 8 month average wait. Boo.

Up: Our artist, Phoenix, won a Grammy!!!! Yay. Yay. Yay. If you're not familiar with them, I'm sure you've heard them in one of the gazillion Cadillac commercials currently running.

Up: Sticking with the musical theme, Cyndi Lauper was in the office today. I LOOOOVE Ms. Lauper. Who doesn't? Seeing someone like her just makes me smile and makes life seem fun and light. Nice aura to have!

Ech: Not to harp on this conference call business, but...something was mentioned that I wasn't aware of nor have I read about this before (and I have done a TON of research).

Children are available for adoption because they are either a) relinquished - parent(s)/living family member(s) willingly give their child(ren) to the orphanage or b) they are abandoned (self-explanatory). That we knew.

What we didn't know is that abandoned children are named by the police officer who writes up their case when taken into the station. After hearing this a few days ago, it still isn't sitting well with us and has taken us aback. Our intention was to take our son's Ethiopian name as his middle name. The whole purpose was because of its meaning and to keep part of our child's past with him forever. Knowing what we know now, I'm not sure we want that. I'm not sure he would. I don't know. We don't know. My middle name is after my maternal grandmother and it's comforting to know that. I wouldn't want that name if I knew a police officer, aka stranger, selected it. Has anyone else faced this and hesitated? not hesitated at all? Should our son be referred to us as an abandoned case, we may be considering a different Ethiopian name.

I would love to hear others' thoughts/experience on this topic. I already want to protect this little guy whom I've never met and do what's right on his behalf. Hmmmm...

And to end on an Up...our nephew thoroughly enjoying his day at Chelsea Piers. The genuine happiness that bouncing brings to a four year old's world! I'm seriously jealous.

The Stroller

The best stroller for NYC?
It has taken us two months of hardcore research to answer this question with an educated guess. The answer for our family is the City Mini.

This predicament doesn't apply to the rest of the country, nor should it be expected to make sense to anyone outside of NYC that your stroller purchase is one of the toughest decisions on your list. As ridiculous as it sounds, it is downright serious.

You see, we don't have a car nor do we want one. That means no throwing the stroller in the trunk. It's with us at all times - up the subway stairs, standing on the train when there are no available seats, collapsing stroller at a moment's notice to hop on the bus & throw it on the floor before the driver pounds on the gas as you maneuver to find a seat with baby flung under your arm - just a few of the daily situations. p.s. - he's NOT going to wait for you to find the 'release' button and tuck it all in neatly. It's pack & go or risk flying down the aisle with arms & gear a flappin'. I've seen it happen!

Now for the weekend...a trip to the museum with lunch and stop by the boutique for some shopping on the way home. All of this is done with no car, no carseat for sleeping, no trunk for storing stuff. And did I mention it's February and there is 2" of snow on the ground? Yes, all of this must be transported, stored, kept warm and travel safely in a stroller. There is no heat, no winter tread, no wipers, no trunk.

The majority of strollers are pulled from the trunk, used in the shop/mall and then put back in the trunk. Our 'trunk' is my back & Kai's back while out and about.

For the past two months, we've researched what seems like every stroller on the market in order to create a short list. Well, our short list still ended up having 20 models on it. So off we went today to test drive each one of them with our excel spreadsheet in hand; noting various pros & cons based on our personal needs and preferences. It's not showing up that well, but if anyone wants it for their own research, I can forward it.

I would like to send a huge thanks to Kai's family! They know NY well and understand our concern for finding the perfect stroller. Because of their generosity, all models were a potential option for us, from the most economical to those that may appear to be pure status symbols and may have otherwise been overlooked. I can honestly say strollers in all categories were considered and the City Mini met each need except two...

1. adjustable handles: okay b/c the fixed height works if you're tall like us
2. air tires: the City Elite (one model up) has air tires but was too heavy for us

The City Mini is one of the lower priced models in the "lightweight-plus" category. The Bugaboo was a strong contender for its quality and smooth steering until after multiple failed attempts at locking the front tires in place in order to move onto the "quick fold" I had red, worn fingers, no more patience and was wondering "where is my baby while I'm doing this with both hands"? For $600-700 they need to fix the plastic lock-grips!!! Are you kidding me??? It was a deal breaker.

I'm not bashing on the Bugaboo. It did make it to the #2 spot. The final push for the City Mini was seeing six of them in use by NYC moms today. One CM-mother even jumped in when she heard us speaking to our rep. When she overheard our conversation with our rep with our criteria, she tapped me on the shoulder and began raving about her City Mini. Our rep then told us it's the number one seller in his store for NYC moms because of its weight, fold and functions. SOLD.

My apologies for the lengthy stroller post, but I must say, I was eager to read personal details when doing our research. Our info may not apply to 90% of those reading this, but for the 10% it makes sense to...I would love to hear your stroller choices and feedback.

Cashmere & The Crusty Cheerio

Pretty self-explanatory, no?

Our nephews are the perfect little guinea pigs as we begin to dip our toes into the unknown; this new world called parenthood. Everytime we're with one of them, I walk away with a bit more insight into what this new world holds for us.

The latest? Bringing a little remnant from our weekend toddler-extravaganza to the office. I had just finished presenting my portion of the project to approximately ten others in the conference room. As I glance down at my notes to make sure I covered everything, I notice a shriveled up, crusty Cheerio dangling (by what is some sticky substance that only a 4-year-old can create) to my cashmere hoodie. OMG. This has been here ALL day. Because it's a hoodie (and did I mention it's cashmere?) I certainly wear it more than once before it hits the dry-cleaner.

For those who don't know me, I am not a fancy-schmancy label-whore. In fact, I find much more pleasure in styling pieces from the local thrift shop with ones I've made myself, so this isn't a snob-thing. It's that this sweater was a gift and one I've had for YEARS. It's my go-to piece for making my own creations look a little more "serious". And now there is a crusty Cheerio stuck to it and I can't stop laughing! This is my new life.

And if I ever write a book, I think I found the title...Cashmere & The Crusty Cheerio.